Sharing #4 Household Salvation

24 “A disciple is not above his teacher, nor a servant above his master. 25It is enough for the disciple to be like his teacher, and the servant like his master. If they have called the master of the house Beelzebul, how much more will they malign those of his household.

26“So have no fear of them, for nothing is covered that will not be revealed, or hidden that will not be known.27What I tell you in the dark, say in the light, and what you hear whispered, proclaim on the housetops. 28And do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather fear him who can destroy both soul and body in hell. 29Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. 30But even the hairs of your head are all numbered. 31Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows. 32 So everyone who acknowledges me before men, I also will acknowledge before my Father who is in heaven, 33but whoever denies me before men, I also will deny before my Father who is in heaven. 34 “Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword. 35 For I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law. 36 And a person’s enemies will be those of his own household. 37Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. 38And whoever does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. 39Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.  (Matthew 10:24-39)

There is great struggle between me and my parents for I have acknowledged firmly the Lord’s hold over my life to them. The truth of Jesus has set my parents against me and this has become undeniably a reality as I seek more and more for His calling rather than my own or my parents’.

First, they are angry and frustrated at me for not having a clear future plan after graduation. When I tell them of Christ and my relationship with the Father, they do not believe the Lord will be faithful to me and instead think I am just being lazy. Though I do admit I am at times lazy and I fail, this is not the main cause for the disappointments and uncertainty of the future, I believe.

Second, they believe I am mad for thinking that God can be so powerful and real in the world. My dad laughed at me and called me crazy three times today when I arrived back home. My mom has called me mad over the phone etc….   T.T

Third, they are misreading my heart and misunderstanding me to such an extreme, it has become a great pain for myself to keep myself together and not become depressed. The doubts of those closest to me can really cut to the heart and potentially upend my faith if not for the Holy Spirit in me. For their flesh is my flesh, thus, their doubts are my doubts. Constantly, I had to lean on the Holy Spirit for support and for peace when I listen to them. He is able to overturn their words with His Truth. Alas,

Whom have I on earth, Lord Jesus,
Whom in heav’n above but Thee?
Now and through eternal ages
Thou art all in all to me!

“When my father and my mother forsake me,
Then the LORD will take care of me.” (Psalm 27:10) (NKJV)

 

 

When I came back to the city today, my conversation with my father quickly went downhill as he focused on my future. Some of what he said were true. But he misinterpreted those facts by putting them under a worldly light and accusing me of failing to “put enough effort” into achieving what I was meant to achieve. How ironic that I see it the other way! I put way too much effort into my selfish ambitions and failed miserably! Apart from God, I can do nothing.

There was great sorrow and depression of my spirit as we continued to talk and as he continued to vent and be frustrated at my “carelessness.” This went on for a good hour or so.

At last, feeling strength from the Spirit, I stated my convictions to him once again which was in short: “The Lord will provide for all my needs and equip me for all the work He gives me.  Though I know not what I am suppose to do in the future yet, He will reveal it to me eventually. No matter what happens, He will most certainly provide for my needs. This I assure you I know fully well and am confident of in my heart. What master will not equip their servant for the work they ought to do? What master will not punish a servant for their laziness? And what is faith but believing that which we do not yet see? Yet, this faith is not mine, it is the Lord’s who dwell in me.”

Nothing more was said after that and I felt my spirit regaining its joy back in the Lord. Even so, I could not take pleasure in that silence and his suddenly calm attitude. Until his heart is actually won over to the Lord, there will be spiritual warfare. How much I need to pray for my heart as much as for my family’s!

Alas, household salvation. How desperately I desire this, Lord. For without Jesus, there will be no peace in this splintered household.

Ah, how shocked I am at myself for the faith that I expressed as I reflect upon it. It came upon me like the wind and the words flowed like never before. Oh, how Your Words burn in my heart. If it is false, if You have not resurrected, indeed, as Paul says, we are to be most pitied of all men for believing in a lie! Yet, how was I able to speak thus to my father? If not by the Holy Spirit, by what authority did I speak with such assurance? Am I a liar and a madman truly now? My heart is not the same. I cannot recognize it as that heart I used to have just a year ago. May this heart never grow cold for You. Only You can keep it aflame.


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